Why love is pain: How to get over a relationship?

Best Arab & Muslims Dating App

Relationships have become an integral part of our lives now. To be honest, it’s the most liberating feeling in the world to find a person who’s just right for you. But sometimes things just don’t seem to work out and the worst possible outcomes reveal themself.

Yes, the process of falling in love is beautiful and that’s the phase in a relationship when you’re sensitive to feeling all sorts of emotions. Everything around and between you two seems to hold some intoxicating magic. Nothing but your other half’s company is needed by you. But, that also means, the process of breaking up with them is hard and it hurts like hell. All the beautiful memories, the moments which you both seemed to have created seem to be delusional and hold no meaning. You are blinded to all your faults but their actions. Ego issues come to rise and everything quite literally becomes a mess including you.

The worst part is to see them move on easily. It makes you question if the beautiful thing which you both had was even real. The reason being, you are constantly haunted by their memories. The “moving-on phase” is the hardest and makes you experience some great deal of emotional breakdowns. No idea about love being a boon or bane but it brings pain.

Lack of compatibility, misunderstandings, miscommunications, jealousy, insecurity, loss of trust, your partner’s shortcomings, mistreatment, and loss of feelings are some of the root reasons why people end a relationship.

The most challenging part being able to move on, to get over your ex. Quite frankly, it depends upon the bond which you both must have shared or how much you invested yourself in the relationship. More investment meaning immense damage and vice-versa. That lingering feeling of longing for them is just hard to get over and can’t be simply ignored. Various mental issues arise and a lack of mental peace and stability is experienced.

But, you gotta do what you gotta do i.e., move on. It’s not easy but it gets easier with time. So, here we are with some tips on how to get over a relationship.

  • Self-reliance: You don’t always have to depend on a person for your emotional support. Moreover, it can never be for sure that the one(s) you love will be there for you in the toughest of your times. Self-reliance is what you need to become. Focus on yourself, develop your strengths and work on your mental and emotional stability instead of grieving. You’re more than what you think of yourself and you’re much more capable than what people make you think of yourself. That’ll be more than enough for you.
  • Talk to Someone: Keeping your feelings, emotions and all that aggression to yourself would be just punishing yourself. Let them out for good. Free them up and decongest yourself. Those things are quite intoxicating and end up being the root reason for your mental and emotional instability. Therefore, share them with someone with whom you feel comfortable. It doesn’t necessarily need to be a friend. People are not that bad when talked to. Of course, it won’t completely heal you but, yes, you’ll be comforted. Also, avoid being antisocial. That will have a reverse reaction and you’ll end up becoming sadder than you were.
  • Keep yourself busy: Sometimes, distractions are not so bad. They’re helpful. Keep yourself busy as a distraction to your sadness. It’ll be hard initially and you’ll find your brain wandering for the unwanted, but trust me, it gets better. Start working hard for your studies, start building up on your weaknesses, make your strengths even better, start playing a sport, start working out or develop a hobby. It could be anything and everything that takes you to focus on yourself.
  • Socialize yourself: One thing that most people fail to realize is that being antisocial after a breakup is a combo attack that should be avoided at all costs. You never know how and when you come across the right people or the right one for that matter of fact. Some right people do come at the right time and you hold the power to let them in. So, why stop something good from coming your way?

These were some insights out of quite some experience in the very domain. Hope they help you and you find your way out of oblivion. To get over someone makes you realize your worth and let me tell to you, you’re worth it and you deserve much more than you believe. Trust the process.

Meet your Soulmate through Online Date

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A sudden thought of dismal and regret comes in our mind if we had a bad experience in terms of dating and we never think of doing the same.

And for the same reason if you have put your dating on hold then let me tell you to continue reading as we have brought an ultimate solution to your problem!  We can assure you of an amazing online dating experience on our online dating platform even during this quarantine.

It’s time to get yourself plugged into the digital world of dating along with us as to greet someone nowadays at a coffee shop is not safe.

Spouslr offers you the next best thing–Here’s how to take advantage of our new and improved platform to date online during the quarantine

Spouslr dating app is an online dating app for Muslims. Based on the market analysis our application has been recognized as Best Arab & Muslim Dating app.

The product completely stands out in the market due to the following features:

Leave Voice Notes

Love conspires a bond nurtured with genuine feelings. So, to create genuine connections, we have come up with voice memos, phone calls, and videos as well! All you need is to woo the person with your charming personality that you hold!

Plan a Virtual Dinner Date

Are you struggling to plan a date for your partner?

I know what you are going through, I’ve been there.

I struggled for years until I just got to know about Virtual Dinner Date.

And then, things became easy for me.

Just forget the last time you brushed your hair or got dolled up. Ditch the onesie, dust off the Cheeto stains from your fingers, and have a virtual dinner date with your new bae. All you need is your favorite bottle of wine, a candle, and an open heart to make your partner feel special.

Will you find the love of your life through Spouslr?

Well, we can’t assure you that.

But If you want to create your own fairy tale with another person, then you need to ditch any tendencies for which the other person can judge you.

Okay, so maybe fairy tales sound a bit dicey, but it’s true that you are more likely to find deep and long-lasting connections by allowing yourself to be vulnerable and trusting the process of online dating.

Have Fun!

We agree online dating apps won’t be as effective as meeting the person physically. But this quarantine all you can do is to solidify your connection with the particular person before meeting with a help of an online dating platform, thereby making your physical connection even sweeter.

So, go have fun!

Who knows, you get a chance to meet your quarantine cutie 😊

Best Arab & Muslims Dating AppThe app can be preferred as a Muslim online dating app or Best Single Muslim Dating App as it can let you meet thousands of your Muslim folks ready to find a partner for them.

When dating online how to move ahead from the initial ‘communication’ Phase


The infamous “communication” phase. That weird in-between stage where you haven’t spent much time in person but continue to grow closer through text, call, video, and the occasional hangout. But, you’re not quite dating yet.
In another time, the communication phase was referred to as courting.

But what happens when the communication phase seems to drag on with no forward motion? If you’re interested in chatting with purpose, here are a few ways to graduate out of the communication phase and into one more substantial.

The communication stage can last months and even years if you don’t establish what you’re looking for. Being open and finding someone willing to be as honest as you are is the key to having your needs met.

“I want to make this official”
“Are we dating?”
“Can we be exclusive”

These are great ways to start the conversation. Ultimately, you’re letting someone know that you have seen enough and experienced them enough to know that you want more. If they aren’t on the same page, you will have saved your time and emotions. Naturally, you could continue to wait it out or move on to someone looking for the same level of commitment as you.

If you don’t prefer to wait until you’re getting to know someone, there is nothing wrong with sharing your intentions right away. Are you looking for a travel buddy, cuddle buddy, a relationship, marriage? Hey, doesn’t hurt to make it known right off the bat.

Avoid Small Talk

If you are seeking for more you have to give more. That means deeper conversations, meaningful dates, and recognizing whether you and your crush are compatible on a more meaningful level.

The last thing you want to do is rush out of the communication stage and into a relationship without really knowing who they are or if this is what you actually want.

Seek companionship not Relationship

Ask the real questions, offer in-depth answers, when it’s right–the next phase of your courting experience will come easier than you think. Find out what their life goals are, what they believe in, political perspectives, and whether or not they want children. Before you ask for their hand in dating, learn as much as possible.

Make The First Move

A lot of us get stuck in the communication phase because we want the other person to take the initiative. This is an ineffective and unfulfilling way to achieve anything in a relationship. Put on your big girl or big boy pants and go for what you want. Chances are, they’re waiting for you to.

Some Healthy Habits that Doesn’t Fit Our Narrative of an “Ideal Relationship”

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Salaam and Welcome to Spouslr, one of the best online dating platform for single Muslims that not just kick starts your journey towards finding your better half but also helps in building and nurturing of a healthy relationship through these little hacks and anecdotes. However, I didn’t want to write yet another “learn to communicate and watch sunsets together” type post. Honestly, those posts are a bit boring. If you love your partner, you shouldn’t have to be told these things instead it should come automatically. Isn’t that right?

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So yes, I wanted to write something different. I wanted to write about issues that are important in relationships but are harder to face–things like the role of fighting, hurting each other’s feelings, dealing with dissatisfaction, or feeling the occasional attraction for other people. In this blog, I will talk about all the healthy relationship habits which most people think are toxic.

Unresolved Conflicts

The idea that couples must communicate and resolve all of their problems is a myth.

In a research of thousands of happily married couples, some of whom have been married for forty-plus years, it was found that most successful couples have persistent unresolved issues, issues that they’ve sometimes been fighting for almost a decade. Meanwhile, many of the unsuccessful couples insisted on resolving and thus, fucking everything up because they believed that there should never be a disagreement between them.

Successful couples accept and understand that some conflicts are inevitable, that there will always be certain things they don’t like about their partner or things they don’t agree with and it is fine. You shouldn’t feel the need to change somebody in order to love them and more importantly you shouldn’t let some disagreements get in the way of a happy and healthy relationship.

Hurting Each Other’s Feelings

When our highest priority in a relationship is to always make ourselves feel good or to always make our partner feel good, then more often than not nobody ends up feeling good. And our relationship falls apart without us even knowing it. If you feel smothered and want some time alone, you should be capable of saying that without blaming your partner and they need to be capable of hearing it without blaming you, despite the unpleasant feelings it may cause.

Hurting Each Other's Feelings

It’s important to set out your priorities straight in a relationship than merely making each other feel good all of the time. The cuddles and sunsets– happen when you get the important stuff figured out: values, needs and trust.

Willingness To End It

Romantic sacrifice has been idealized in our culture. Almost every romantic movie is bound to feature a desperate and needy character who treats themselves like shit for the sake of being in love with someone. The truth to be told our standards of a “successful relationship” are pretty screwed up. It’s this irrational idealization that leads people to stay with partners who treat them like shit, to give up on their own needs and identities, to suppress their own pain and suffering in the name of maintaining a relationship.

Sometimes the only thing that can make a relationship successful is ending it at the necessary time before it becomes too damaging. And the willingness to do that allows us to establish the necessary boundaries to help ourselves and our partner grow together.

Attracted To Someone Other Than Your Partner

The truth is, not only are we capable of finding multiple people attractive and interesting at the same time, it’s a biological inevitability but what isn’t inevitable is our decision to act on the attraction or not. Most of us, most of the time, choose to not act on those feelings. And like waves, they pass through us and leave us with our partner very much the same way they found us.

Looking at attractive people is pleasurable. Speaking to attractive people is pleasurable. Thinking about attractive people is pleasurable. While it is okay to appreciate the attention or even flirtation, the experience will only strengthen your commitment because attractiveness is everywhere; real intimacy is not. When we commit to a person, we are not committing our thoughts, feelings or perceptions to them. We can’t control our thoughts, feelings, and perceptions most of the time, so how could we ever make that commitment?

However, What we can control are our actions. And what we commit to that special person are those actions.

Taking Your Space and Time

When we fall in love with someone we develop irrational beliefs and desires. One of these desires is to allow our lives to be consumed by the person with whom we’re infatuated. This feels great but the problem with allowing your identity to be consumed by a romantic relationship is that as you change to be closer to the person you love, you cease to be the person they fell in love with in the first place.

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It’s important to occasionally get some distance from your partner, assert your independence, maintain some hobbies or interests that are yours alone. Have some separate friends; take an occasional trip somewhere by yourself; remember what made you you and what drew you to your partner in the first place.

Embracing Each Other’s Flaws

The most accurate metric for your love of somebody is how you feel about their flaws. If you accept them and even adore some of their shortcomings — her obsessive cleanliness, his awkward social ticks — and they can accept and even adore some of your shortcomings, well, that’s a sign of true intimacy.

It may be our perfections that attract one another in the first place. But it’s our imperfections that decide whether or not we stay together.

Have had a number of failed relationships and couldn’t figure out what went wrong? I guess you do now. Give yourself another chance at finding love with the help of the best online dating app for Muslims.